China - Day 6 & 7

I'm trying to number the days to keep better track of our trip. A quick recap so I'll remember later:

Day 1 (11/1/18): Leave for China - 6:30am flight to Detroit. Goal was to leave the house by 3:30 (obvi it was a little later). Six hour layover in Detroit then fly Detroit to Beijing.

Day 2 (11/2/18): Land in Beijing around 4pm local time (yes, 4pm the NEXT day). Get through customs (where Ben had a seizure 😢), get luggage and find our guide, Nelson. Take van to hotel. Jeremy walked a couple blocks and got us McDonalds and we all crashed.

Day 3 (11/3/18): Tour Tiananmen Square, the Forbidden City, and the Great Wall of China.

Day 4 (11/4/18): Fly from Beijing to Zhengzhou. Crash by like 7:30 (consequently awake at about 3am the next morning).

Day 5 (11/5/18): Meet Cabot (see Family Day post)!

Which brings us to Day 6 - Tuesday, November 6th. Cabot slept well and didn't act too scared in the morning. We went to the breakfast buffet in the hotel and we learned he LOVES watermelon. We hung out in the hotel all day today because our sightseeing tour was cancelled due to rain. This was definitely not a bad thing and it was nice to have a more relaxed day.

Cabot didn't cry much today but we had several rounds of "the crazies." He gets almost maniacal and runs around the room picking up things and throwing them, he dropped a sucker stick in the air purifier, and laughs hysterically at nothing in particular. We're thinking this is part of how he's coping with his grief and we've heard from some other adoptive parents that their kiddos also reacted this way but it eventually resolves once they feel safe and secure and know they can just be themselves and they'll be loved no matter what.

Cabot gave Baba a kiss!

All the silliness turned to sadness throughout the night. I don't want to share too much about Cabot's grief because it's his story so you won't see any videos or pictures of his really hard times. This isn't intentionally sharing the highlight reel, rather it's about not sharing anything that he may not want shared 10 years down the road. But I also want to try to convey his sadness and the experience.

We've heard many comments about how lucky Cabot is to be joining our family and how happy he'll be and while I'm sure there will be much happiness is his future, right now his entire world has been torn apart. He's been ripped away from everyone he knows and loves. And he's grieving. Like waking up crying - grieving. Body shaking sobs - grieving. Running around like a crazy person because his little brain and body can't put together any other way of processing and handling what's happened to him - grieving.

And that's all okay. We'll do our best to make him feel safe and loved until he DOES feel safe and loved.

That little finger in his mouth!

Day 7 (11/7/18): We started the day by going to the Civil Affairs office to finalize our adoption. Essentially we signed papers when we got Cabot to care for him for 24 hours. During this period, families can change their minds. It's rare, but it happens. But we know this boy is meant to be ours forever so we agreed to love him like we do our biological children and we signed one more paper and that's it - he's ours. Forever and ever.

Next up was the notary office where we signed more papers. Then we came back and had lunch. Then we went to the police station to apply for Cabot's passport. Of note, Cab gets carsick. Like every. single. time. we're in the car. Poor baby.

Ainsley and I made a trip to Walmart for provisions (snacks, pop, and Ziploc bags for more car sickness). We had to take a taxi to the mall - the Walmart is in the basement of the mall - so different than home!

Ainsley's first cab ride.

This is how LOTS of people get around - scooters. It's a MIRACLE that more people don't die with how the scooters and cars dart around each other.

Scooters parked outside the mall!

We boiled water in the room and had noodles for dinner - the food at our hotel is expensive!

Now we're winding down for the night. I just want to add too that Cabot has "attached" to Jeremy. The topics of adoption and attachment go hand-in-hand and it's a good sign that he's attached to one of us. It's also completely normal that it's just one of us for now. He really doesn't want anything to do with me. He cries if I pick him up. Jeremy can't leave the room without him or he'll cry. He clings to Jeremy's finger when we're walking. He raises his sweet little arms for Jeremy to pick him up. They sleep together. He only lets Jeremy feed him. He'll literally push my hand away if I take the fork from Jeremy and try to give him a bite. And while I can't wait to bond with him and hold him and love on him, I'll be as patient as he needs.

Thanks for reading and for all your support, friends!

Cabot's Room

We are so stinking excited to bring Cab home to his room!

 

Jeremy made some bookshelves for Cab's room just like Ben and Ainsley have. 

It took about 12 years for me to get this little collage wall just how I wanted it. 

Consequently there are a LOT of extra holes in the wall. 

Santa brought this little guy for Cab LAST Christmas. So excited for him to finally get it!

We still have puzzle pieces left - if you'd like one click the "donate" button.

Flights Booked!

Our consulate appointment is confirmed and we booked our international flights. We leave for China in 29 days. It seems SO far away right now but it's going to be a very busy 29 days and I'm sure it will fly by.

I wanted to give a brief rundown of what our trip will be like. We'll leave November 1st and return November 16th. After the first five days it's tentative.

Thursday 11/1: Leave Des Moines for Beijing. Total travel time: 21 hours 11 minutes
Friday 11/2: Arrive in Beijing 4:45pm (they're currently 13 hours ahead of us)
Saturday 11/3: Sightseeing in Beijing - Great Wall, Tiananman Square, Forbidden City
Sunday 11/4: Travel to Henan Province where Cabot lives
Monday 11/5: MEET OUR SON!
Tuesday 11/6: Finalize adoption
Wednesday 11/7: Waiting for passport
Thursday 11/8: Waiting for passport
Friday 11/9: Receive passport. Travel to Guangzhou.
Saturday 11/10: Medical exam for Cab
Sunday 11/11: Waiting/sightseeing
Monday 11/12: Waiting/sightseeing
Tuesday 11/13: Appointment at US Consulate
Wednesday 11/14: Waiting
Thursday 11/15: Receive Cabot's visa; take train to Hong Kong
Friday 11/16: Leave Hong Kong for home. Total travel time 30 hours 2 minutes...pray for us.

What we're doing while we wait to leave: I'll be re-reading the "adoption bible" aka Mine in China. We have videos about adoption to watch from our social worker. Make 72 packing lists. Brainstorm ways to entertain 3 kids for 30 hours as we travel home. Pray for ALL the patience in world, for smooth travels, for Cabot to transition to our family as well as possible, for us to be patient and understanding with his grief and to know how best to help him.

We'll also be celebrating Ainsley and Benson's SEVENTH birthday. I'll try to not spend all day crying in the corner. But no promises. Instead of having a big birthday party this year, Ben and Ainsley chose to go to the Ed Sheeren concert in Kansas City so we have that super fun trip coming up.

I also have a work trip the week before we leave. We are SO busy this month which I love but I'm so worried about someone getting sick!

Random thought: It's really kind of hard to buy an entire wardrobe for a 4 year old. Especially one whom you've never seen in person so you're guessing sizes based on height and weight measurements which may or may not be accurate. Add in you only buy clothes on sale or with coupons and it's kind of tricky! But I'm still SO thankful for the opportunity to do it. Even if I have spent eleventy hundred hours of my life on the Old Navy and Target websites recently. ;)

I hope to share Cab's room with you soon - it's SO close to done!

And of course we still have puzzle pieces! If you'd like to buy one go to the Puzzle Fundraiser post where you'll find the PayPal link and as always thank you ALL for your generosity, support, and kindness!

Article 5 Picked Up

Our Article 5 was picked up today from the U.S. Consulate in Guangzhou! This is the final "approval" from the United States government indicating they've looked over all our documents and agree that everything is in order. Our agency's representative in Guangzhou will now mail the Article 5 and LSC/LOA to the China Center for Children's Welfare and Adoption (CCCWA) who will issue our travel approval (TA) - this is currently taking about 7 days. Once the TA is issued our agency can contact the U.S. Consulate in Guangzhou again to request an immigrant visa appointment. Once our consulate appointment is booked the agency will arrange our Family Day with the SWI (Social Welfare Institute - a euphemism for orphanage) and then we can book our travel!

We've been working on this process for almost a year now - our original preliminary application with a different agency was sent 9/29/17. It's so surreal to actually have the end in sight. Some days I can almost FEEL him in my arms but other days it's hard to imagine this is actually going to happen.

Just for fun, here's the first video we received with our son's file. That smile at the end sealed the deal!

And here's an updated look at our puzzle fundraiser:

Here's the link if you'd like to purchase a puzzle piece ($10 each). Be sure to let me know what name(s) you would like on your piece(s)!

 Thank you so very much to everyone that has contributed. It truly means so much to us!

Puzzle Fundraiser

We're getting so close to meeting our son! We are doing one final fundraiser - an Adoption Puzzle!

Our adoption costs will range from $30,000-$40,000 and while we are both blessed to have good jobs we don't have that much extra lying around. We know that there are all sorts of pieces to this puzzle to be able to bring our little guy home and we would be so grateful if you would join us in piecing it together!

This is how the Adoption Puzzle works:  You may purchase a piece of the puzzle for $10. We will write your name on one of the 520 puzzle pieces. As the puzzle pieces are dedicated, we reassemble  the puzzle and post the progress here on the blog. You can watch for your name and piece to be added! When the puzzle is complete, we will frame it between two pieces of glass, so that we will always have a reminder of all the pieces coming together and all the people who helped bring our son home!

Note that you can certainly buy more than one piece and/or donate more than $10 if you feel so inclined. If a financial donation isn't right for you we're also so grateful to have your thoughts and prayers!

You can use this PayPal donate button or if you're more comfortable mailing a check, you can email me at reannayenger@gmail.com for our address. Let me know in the comment/note in PayPal what name(s) you would like on your puzzle piece(s). I’ll put your requested name(s) on one piece for every $10 donated. 

Pieces Remaining: 104

Pieces SOLD: 416

Pieces to our adoption puzzle: 

Beth Larson
Joe & Jeannie Grife
Cooper & Hudson Grife
Amanda Gymer
Courtney Reeves
Ashley Lappe 
Deppe Family 
Pickett Family
Sherry & Tony Pressgrove
Monica Malmberg 
Maggie Hummel 
Will Edgar 
Heather Matson 
Jane Keith
Bruce Keith
Herzog Family 
Heidi Woollums 
Manda Clark
The Zinks
In memory of Rylie & Avary Andrews 
Kelsey Moes
Bryce & Laura Moes
The Hornbuckles
Brayton Wickliff & Family
Kim & Ray Heimann
Grandma & Grandpa Yenger
Jessica Dowell
Tana Wagschal
Darcey Reynolds and Boys 
Brianne Ferneau
Brexley VanDusseldorp
Rae Ann Hoffert
Kari & Curt Tiffany
Mckenzie Sparks
The Mortensons
Jill Versteeg & Family
Chris & Shannon Fisher
Grauerholz Family
Carley & Kyle Anderson
Daryl & Esther Grife
The Pagelers 
The Sullivans
The Shangs
Tonia Cheung 
Grace Griffin
Jack Griffin
Emme Griffin
Megan Olson
Jennifer and Sophia Hrubetz
Nick & Julie Smith
Travis & Hollie Allen
Katie Clausman
Griffin Idleman
Brooke Egly
The Lopez Family
Collin, Danielle, Eden, and Ezalea Barnes
Patrick Kearney
Brogan Kearney
Eric & Janell Karsten
Ashlyn & Landon Karsten
Casey B.
Cara & Kohen Smith
Michael Bahr
Linda Wormley
Austin Hartsook
Ms. Angela Johnson
Alicia Kaldenberg
Hannah Dannewitz
Alexander Stanbrough
Auntie Jenn
Sarah Newell
Dan Newell
Violet Newell
James Newell
Alex Riney
Larry & Peney Stewart
In Memory of Howard & Helen Snook
The Hurts
Mark & Beth Augspurger
Travis & Shannon Wilkinson
Tammy Bestell & Dave Evans
The Burns Family
Ann Rankin
Sonya Putz
John Guthrie
Nancy Nikkel
Josh Whitson
Tara Whitson
Izabella Whitson
Gabriel Whitson
Brklyn Whitson
Mark & Wendy Wickliff 
Derek & Amy Scroggins
Melissa Strand
Payton Strouf
Parker Strouf
Joslyn Strouf
Aunt Debbie Yenger
Stefanie and Ryan Geismann
The Sommars Family
The Antle Family In Memory of Bob Antle
Doug Smith for each of his children
Bandit
The Varvel Family
Brennan Charley
Allison Walker 
Lori Osborn
Alex & Chelsie Modlin
Chelsie Crady
Corey & Amber Baker
The Nunnikhoven Family
Nikki Brain
The Nelsons
Jason & Teresa Price 
Noah Price
Jamison Price
Melissa Bennett
Darin & Sharon Swarts
Ryan Gott
Braedon Oliphant
Brienna Oliphant
Delanie Oliphant
Melissa Peterson & Family
Schechinger Family
Jim Lahart
Emily Lahart
Grant Lahart
Jamison Lahart
Caden Lahart
Lacey Bozarth & Family
Shelly Moore
Lindy Fisher & Family
Kelly Sorenson
Joan Lamb
Julia Zhang
Mama Frisbie
The Fitzgeralds
The Kukers
The Ashbys
Lisa Gomez
The Vasseau Family
In Memory of Rick Vasseau
Barbara Hackworth
Liasa Hackworth
Eric & Ashley Dodd
Reese Hammons
Zoey Dodd
Jackson Dodd
Harley Neal 
John Neal
Cole Neal
Jim & Lynette Whitson
Angie Mohler
American Legion Post #355
The Prasads 
Amber Hull
The Ham Family
Jeff Yenger
Carol Yenger
Ashley Yenger
Bradley Yenger
Brittany Burns
Brynn Burns
Camden Burns
Kari Gray
The Bell Family 
The McNeeley Family 
Heidi Gelinas-Sumpter
Jennifer Dawson
Jenny Slycord and family
The Deegan Family
Jessica Martinson 
Greyson and Leland Thompson
Katelyn and Allie Lambert
Michelle and Richard Ouren
The Burdess Family
Chris and Shannon Fisher in memory of Ruth Fisher
Sydney, Connor, and Genevieve Van Houten
Chelsea Berry
The Sinwell Family
Abby Puk and Jeremy Caracci
Mindy Guerra
The Guerra Family
Dean & Karla Vanderleest
In Memory of Greyson Lahart
Nate
Grant
Jamison
Caden
Justin and Sara Bailey and Family
The Hyem Family
Kenli Beck
Carroll and Terry Hornbuckle
Libby Templeman
Theresa Selzer and Juvie
Max & Bev Fisher
Roz & Kipp Weaver
Lucinda Sinclair
Lacey Nickelson and family
The Chhouy Family
The Gogerty Family
Jess, Jamel, Quinn, Cohen and Grayer
Theresa Comer and family
Tess Stein
Kristi Ecklein and family
Nicole Zvosecz
Alex & Nicole Miller
Jeremy & Courtney Claussen
Ben, Brandon, and Briar Claussen
Megan Petersen & Kaylin  
The Lampe Family 
The Stoltz Family

 

Adoption Update

Adoption status: chugging along.

We have gotten through a couple more steps since the last update (when we got our LOA from China). After that we sent in all the paperwork for I800 which is a request to USCIS (United States Citizenship and Immigration Services) to adopt OUR son - the specific child that China has now approved us to adopt. We previously got I800a approval which is permission from USCIS to adopt A child from China, but not specifically our son although we were already matched with him at that time.

So we sent all that paperwork off and it reached Texas on 7/31...and then we waited. It can take up to 30 days for this step but we got our approval 8/14 - yay! Next USCIS sends our information to NVC (National Visa Center). They issue us what's called a GUZ number. GUZ is an abbreviation for Guangzhou which is where the U.S. consulate is in China that we'll visit to get Cabot's visa to come to the United States. We have to have the GUZ # so we can fill out the DS-260 (immigrant visa) application. Then the DS-260 confirmation and the letter from the NVC (the one with the GUZ #) are sent to our agency's representative in China. They already have ALLLLL our other paperwork. They then take all this paperwork and drop it off at the actual consulate in Guangzhou (referred to as Article 5 drop off) then they'll be given a date to come pick it all up about 2 weeks later. This step is basically the U.S. consulate going over all our documents and information to make sure everything is on the up-and-up. They'll issue a document called the Article 5 and the agency representative will pick it up and send it to the CCCWA (China Center for Children's Welfare and Adoption). They will review everything and then issue Travel Approval or TA. At that point our agency can schedule a consulate appointment and our Family/Gotcha Day and we can plan our travel.

I800 Approval - woohoo!

We're currently at the Article 5 step.

Unfortunately our agency recently changed to only one travel group per month rather than every week. I don't think we're going to get travel approval in time for the October Family Day so we're thinking we'll travel at the beginning of November. I'm DYING to know exactly. I'm a planner and not knowing when we're leaving and meeting our son has been a HUGE struggle for me. I'm constantly trying to remind myself to trust in God's timing and everything will work out exactly as it's supposed to.

Just for fun if you got through all this, here's a couple pics we've gotten of Cab when he was younger.

A (Non-) Update

Currently our update is that we don't really have an update.

We're on day 52 of our wait for LOA/LSC (Letter of Approval/Letter Seeking Confirmation) which is our approval from China to adopt OUR son. The LSC is literally a letter China sends to our agency after they've approved us, then our agency sends it to us, and by signing it we are saying we confirm we want to adopt this child.

We're hoping for not more than about 2 more weeks of waiting but you just.never.know with China. A couple months ago LOAs were only taking forty-something days but now they're more between 60 and 70 and you'll occasionally see over 90 days.

Once we get our LOA we have a few more steps to complete and no, we don't know when we'll be going to China. Our best case scenario (which I think is pretty unlikely but a girl can dream) would be to be on the short end for all the remaining steps and leave for China at the end of September. October is more likely and November is a possibility if things are slow.

As you probably know we did a tshirt fundraiser through One Mission and we've been so humbled by everyone that has contributed and is helping us bring Cabot home. It's so amazing to have the support of family and friends (and some complete strangers)!

DTC!

We're DTC!

Are you asking, "Huh?"

Well let me tell you. DTC = Dossier To China. And it's kind of a big deal (in Ron Burgandy voice).

In fact it's such a big deal I made a meme.

This marks the end of our "paper chase." We gathered birth and marriage certificates, medical forms, psychological evaluations, verification of employment, financial statements, and our completed/approved home study. We had police reports ran, wrote an application letter, and included our I800a approval. Then we had ALL those documents notarized. Then we had the notarizations certified by the Secretary of State. Then we had the Secretary of State certifications certified by the United States Department of State. Then we had the state and national certifications authenticated by the Chinese Consulate in Washington D.C. Then all the documents went to our agency, they looked everything over, and FINALLY they sent it to China today. Finally. 

In about a week we'll receive a LID - Log-In Date. That's the day China logs in our dossier and we start counting days until we receive LSC - Letter Seeking Confirmation. The LSC means our dossier has been reviewed, approved, and they are asking us to confirm we want to adopt Cabot.  Currently the average wait from LID to LSC is about 2 months. And of course that's not the end. There are more steps and more waiting after that.

We're currently hoping to travel in September though I sadly have to acknowledge that it could be October. Either way, we're ALL so excited to bring Cab home. 

We're coming for you Cabot! You are so loved!