Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Life's Not Fair Explanation

So some of you might have seen my Facebook post last week about life not being fair. Several people texted me or sent me messages so some of you know what's going on but for everyone else who is familiar with our saga here's the scoop.

We did our first round of in-vitro fertilization about this time last year. We transferred two embryos and did not get pregnant. A couple months later we transferred two more and again, nothing happened. On November 12th, we transferred our last three frozen embryos. I didn't blog about it and didn't even tell anyone (not even my mom which is crazy for me). We just felt like we wanted to go ahead and give it a try but keep it to ourselves.

On Sunday, November 21st I had my first EVER positive home pregnancy test.

Then I had about eight more positive home pregnancy tests. I could not get enough of peeing on a stick.

The first digital test I took came back negative but the regular ones were giving me faint positives. Some you had to tilt just right and have under the fluorescent lights but it was there. Finally, the morning of my blood pregnancy test (Wednesday, November 24th) I had a positive digital test. We were pretty much ecstatic but also trying to keep a level head because we know all the possibilities for something to go wrong. So I had my blood drawn and we got a call from my doctor a couple hours later that yes I was pregnant but my HCG level was 15 and he likes to see it over 100 so he was "not real hopeful." We had to wait two days and go in again last Friday for another HCG level. It was 9. It felt like we didn't have much to be thankful for this Thanksgiving. The doctor said to quit taking my progesterone injections and remove my estrogen patches and I would miscarry. Sidenote, I hate the word "miscarriage." I keep saying "the M word" because I don't like to say it.

We are angry and sad and at the same time hopeful. Jeremy and I both have thought that at least SOMETHING happened and so maybe next time it will work. However, we are discouraged by when "next time" might be. We will basically be starting over and so we are looking at $12,000 to $14,000.

Thank you to everyone who has been supportive and encouraging in this journey. We can't say enough how helpful it is to have you all as friends and family.

These beautiful cheer-me-uppers arrived yesterday from my mom and sister:

1 comment:

  1. R-
    Please know that we are lifting you up in prayer right now. I know in my heart that God has an amazing plan for you and Jeremy. I pray that He continues to give you comfort as He lays the groundwork for something AMAZING!(Because with God, it always is amazing!)
    Love and Hugs!