Day 1 (11/1/18): Leave for China - 6:30am flight to Detroit. Goal was to leave the house by 3:30 (obvi it was a little later). Six hour layover in Detroit then fly Detroit to Beijing.
Day 2 (11/2/18): Land in Beijing around 4pm local time (yes, 4pm the NEXT day). Get through customs (where Ben had a seizure 😢), get luggage and find our guide, Nelson. Take van to hotel. Jeremy walked a couple blocks and got us McDonalds and we all crashed.
Day 3 (11/3/18): Tour Tiananmen Square, the Forbidden City, and the Great Wall of China.
Day 4 (11/4/18): Fly from Beijing to Zhengzhou. Crash by like 7:30 (consequently awake at about 3am the next morning).
Day 5 (11/5/18): Meet Cabot (see Family Day post)!
Which brings us to Day 6 - Tuesday, November 6th. Cabot slept well and didn't act too scared in the morning. We went to the breakfast buffet in the hotel and we learned he LOVES watermelon. We hung out in the hotel all day today because our sightseeing tour was cancelled due to rain. This was definitely not a bad thing and it was nice to have a more relaxed day.
Cabot didn't cry much today but we had several rounds of "the crazies." He gets almost maniacal and runs around the room picking up things and throwing them, he dropped a sucker stick in the air purifier, and laughs hysterically at nothing in particular. We're thinking this is part of how he's coping with his grief and we've heard from some other adoptive parents that their kiddos also reacted this way but it eventually resolves once they feel safe and secure and know they can just be themselves and they'll be loved no matter what.
 |
| Cabot gave Baba a kiss! |
All the silliness turned to sadness throughout the night. I don't want to share too much about Cabot's grief because it's his story so you won't see any videos or pictures of his really hard times. This isn't intentionally sharing the highlight reel, rather it's about not sharing anything that he may not want shared 10 years down the road. But I also want to try to convey his sadness and the experience.
We've heard many comments about how lucky Cabot is to be joining our family and how happy he'll be and while I'm sure there will be much happiness is his future, right now his entire world has been torn apart. He's been ripped away from everyone he knows and loves. And he's grieving. Like waking up crying - grieving. Body shaking sobs - grieving. Running around like a crazy person because his little brain and body can't put together any other way of processing and handling what's happened to him - grieving.
And that's all okay. We'll do our best to make him feel safe and loved until he DOES feel safe and loved.
 |
| That little finger in his mouth! |
Day 7 (11/7/18): We started the day by going to the Civil Affairs office to finalize our adoption. Essentially we signed papers when we got Cabot to care for him for 24 hours. During this period, families can change their minds. It's rare, but it happens. But we know this boy is meant to be ours forever so we agreed to love him like we do our biological children and we signed one more paper and that's it - he's ours. Forever and ever.
Next up was the notary office where we signed more papers. Then we came back and had lunch. Then we went to the police station to apply for Cabot's passport. Of note, Cab gets carsick. Like every. single. time. we're in the car. Poor baby.
Ainsley and I made a trip to Walmart for provisions (snacks, pop, and Ziploc bags for more car sickness). We had to take a taxi to the mall - the Walmart is in the basement of the mall - so different than home!
 |
| Ainsley's first cab ride. |
This is how LOTS of people get around - scooters. It's a MIRACLE that more people don't die with how the scooters and cars dart around each other.
 | ||
| Scooters parked outside the mall! |
We boiled water in the room and had noodles for dinner - the food at our hotel is expensive!
Now we're winding down for the night. I just want to add too that Cabot has "attached" to Jeremy. The topics of adoption and attachment go hand-in-hand and it's a good sign that he's attached to one of us. It's also completely normal that it's just one of us for now. He really doesn't want anything to do with me. He cries if I pick him up. Jeremy can't leave the room without him or he'll cry. He clings to Jeremy's finger when we're walking. He raises his sweet little arms for Jeremy to pick him up. They sleep together. He only lets Jeremy feed him. He'll literally push my hand away if I take the fork from Jeremy and try to give him a bite. And while I can't wait to bond with him and hold him and love on him, I'll be as patient as he needs.
No comments:
Post a Comment